The 25 Greatest Video Game Athletes

By Rob Galbreath / August 12, 2007

Sports gamers are in for a career year on Wii. Mario is already online and on the pitch. The BIGS makes it possible for players to grab a bat and face Daisuke Matsusaka. Tiger Woods looks to recover from a rough Wii debut and win one for his baby girl. Longtime rivals will square off at the Olympic Games. Racing fans will get the chance to relive the most dangerous years in Indy 500 history. And, oh yeah, Madden Day is almost here.

So take a time out, put down the playbook, and join The Wiire as we count down the 25 greatest video game athletes of all time. Beating any one of these All-Star avatars ranks among the most gratifying accomplishments in gaming. See where your favorite ranks, and if my beloved New England Patriots are still trying to catch Bo Jackson.

25. The Great Puma, Pro Wrestling

We could debate wrestling's legitimacy as a sport until Vince McMahon's entertainment empire falls, but there's no denying the athleticism required to do the job of a professional wrestler. The Great Puma, who made his 1987 debut in Pro Wrestling for the NES, is the greatest virtual wrestler ever. As the game's final boss, his move set featured all of the other characters' special moves. The Great Puma could pull off Enziguris, summersault kicks, or even the dreaded Piranha Bite with ease. Pinning The Great Puma, which some say is as hard as knocking out Mike Tyson, will earn you the most infamous victory screen in gaming history: "A Winner Is You!"

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UZJDkYmnPvo[/youtube]

24. The Fat Guy, Ice Hockey

Every good hockey team needs an enforcer. Ice Hockey for the NES lets you play with up to four. There are only three players to choose from - The Skinny Guy, The Medium Guy, and The Fat Guy. The Fat Guy is the slowest, but his slap shot is supreme and he's a better at stopping the puck than your team's goalie.

Ice Hockey, 1988

23. Michael Jordan, NBA 2K3

The virtual career at our #23 spot is hardly befitting of the greatest athlete to ever wear that number. Jordan appeared in many basketball games featuring just his team or himself (starting with 1988's Bird vs. Jordan for the Commodore 64), but he was conspicuously absent from the full-featured basketball sims of the 90s.

His most notable appearance of the decade was in 1994's Chaos in the Windy City as a side-scrolling, platform-hopping hero who used super-powered basketballs to freeze enemies, collect keys, and save the city. Visual Concepts' NBA 2K3 tried to make up for lost time by making playable characters of both the '80s era and '90s era Jordan (a Gatorade pickup game come true), but by then it was too little, too late. At least we were spared seeing him in a sequel to RBI Baseball.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O6nljThMtEc[/youtube]

22. Barry Bonds, Sports Talk Baseball
Sports Talk Baseball for the SEGA Genesis was revolutionary with its play-by-play commentary and robust player statistics based on the 1991 season. At the time, Barry Bonds had only hit 142 home runs. Sixteen years, 616 home runs (and counting), and a couple of new hat sizes later, he is baseball's home run king. Sports Talk Baseball was the first to recognize his potential to break Hank Aaron's hallowed record; Barry crushed almost every pitch he saw for a home run. Think of it as Bonds' real-life 2001 season a decade early.

Bonds in 1991

21. Waluigi, Mario Strikers Charged

Although Walugi is labeled a "defensive" captain and his shooting skill is statistically average, he is the biggest offensive threat in the game. Waluigi can use his "Wall-luigi" special move to put a wall of thorns on the field between him and would-be tacklers. Protected on all sides, he is free to launch Megastrikes that shoot up to six balls at once at near-unblockable speed. Using "Wall-luigi" to separate himself from defenders, Waluigi can make scoring from the corner look more effortless than David Beckham does.

20. Shaquille O'Neal

The Big Aristotle will not be remembered by gamers for being an unstoppable force in NBA Live '95 even though hitting the button to line up the free throw meter was like trying to time a pull on a slot machine. No, O'Neal was reduced to trading punches with Michael Jackson in Ready 2 Rumble Boxing Round 2 after being the star of Shaq Fu, the worst fighting game ever made.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8c-1OlpkHU[/youtube]

19. LaDanian Tomlinson, Madden NFL 07 (Wii)

No virtual athlete has benefited more from FreeMotion Controls than the already-elusive LaDanian Tomlinson. Pulling off jukes, spins, and cut-backs is easy and intuitive with the Wii Remote.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZSBv2j7WJOc[/youtube]

18. Paste- Bases Loaded

Like Pele, LeBron, and Tiger, Paste only needs one name. Like Barry Bonds in Sports Talk Baseball, he will crush every pitch he sees for a home run. Like Izzy Alcantara in this clip, Paste rushes the mound and starts a brawl every time you throw at him.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZAYp6v7Owew[/youtube]

17. Mario Lemieux, NHL '94

Super Mario (no, not him) was good for at least a hat trick in every game of NHL '94. He was stronger and faster than all the other players, and his shot was so accurate that it was like he was sinking billiard balls in the corner pocket instead of always slipping pucks just out of the goalie's reach.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jW2C3Qq9BVc[/youtube]
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16. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Slam 'n' Jam '96 featuring Magic and Kareem

If you couldn't score 100 points with Kareem, you just weren't trying. His signature sky hook was unblockable and it never missed. Fouls were set to 'off' by default, so players could use Kareem (whose arm bent like a tire iron when he jumped) to attack airborne opponents from behind. It was so easy to rack up steals with this method that triple-doubles were guaranteed every game. Of course, Hollywood stole Kareem from gamers. No, I'm not talking about Airplane...

15. Jerry Rice

Rice was unquestionably the greatest receiver in Tecmo Super Bowl. In the rare event that his quarterback (the legendary Joe Montana) misfired the ball, Rice would make gravity-defying catches to reel in the pass, even if he was covered by two or three defenders. Rice fared just as well in the 90s, teaming with Steve Young, Ricky Waters, and Deion Sanders as championship favorites in the 16-bit Madden games.

When Madden shifted to 3D, Rice and Terrell Owens made one of the most frightening receiver tandems in series history. Rice's most recent digital success is as cover athlete for All-Pro Football 2K8. The real-life G.O.A.T. has never been the greatest overall player in any video game, but he's the only athlete that can claim to be a constant threat for the entire history of console gaming.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=450Fkqa_tBQ&mode=related&search=[/youtube]

14. Charles Barkley

The Round Mound of Rebound was a career 27% shooter from behind the three-point arc, but somebody forgot to tell the programmers behind NBA Jam. It didn't matter if Barkley was double-teamed or shooting from half court, he never missed a three pointer as long as players released the ball before he started coming down from his jump.

Barkley, Shut Up and Jam!, 1993

More true to life, Barkley was one of the game's best rebounders and inside scorers. Not only was Barkley NBA Jam's best inside-outside threat, but his performance inspired the street ball spin-off series Barkley, Shut Up and Jam! (and popular RPG Maker demo Barkley, Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden). If only we could get Sir Charles and Dick Bavetta to star in a Wii-make of Track and Field.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9twwa9DvE1U[/youtube]

13. QB Eagles, Tecmo Super Bowl

Long before Michael Vick, there was Randall Cunningham - at least in spirit. Cunningham was the Eagles' quarterback in Tecmo Super Bowl, but he was not part of the licensing agreement with the NFL Players' Association. "QB Eagles," the generic name given to Cunningham's sprite, was the most versatile weapon in Tecmo Super Bowl. He could throw as well as any quarterback, and was as fast as every running back but one.

The only thing keeping "QB Eagles" from being a top-five athlete is the same thing that derailed the real Cunningham. "QB Eagles" was the most injury-prone player in Tecmo Bowl, and those who took the Eagles through season mode would have to put faith in their backup. Since "QB Eagles" was born under a bad sign, he gets lucky number 13 on this list.

Tecmo Super Bowl, 1991

12. Hillary Clinton, NBA Jam: Tournament Edition

The Wiire won't tell its American readers how to vote come 2008, but if they want the candidate with the biggest vertical leap, forget former New Jersey senator (and New York Knicks forward) Bill Bradley - go with Hillary Clinton. Bill and Hillary Clinton were playable characters in NBA Jam: Tournament Edition and Ready to Rumble Boxing Round 2. Video game violence is a hot-button issue for politicians today, but the former First Lady caught "on fire!" in 1994 and went toe to toe with Mama Tua in 2000.

The real Mother of All Boxers

11. Sunday Tiger Woods

No series of games baring the name of a single athlete has endured as long (or been as good) as Tiger Woods PGA Tour, but the greatest golfer of all time is not even the greatest golfer in his own video game. That distinction goes to created players in the series, who can have their stats increased to beyond even Tiger's default levels.

What separates Tiger from his created counterparts is the same thing that separates him from his real-life competition: killer instinct. No one is better than Tiger on the last day of a golf tournament, and that is reflected in the games when default Tiger Woods becomes Sunday Tiger Woods. Sunday Tiger hits shots that other golfers can only dream about. If you want to beat him, you have to play literally perfect golf.

10. Quentin Sands, Blitz: The League

Sands was modeled after and voiced by the incomparable Lawrence Taylor. The game begins with Sands putting a career-ending hit on your team's star quarterback (whether medicals bills were sent to Joe Theissman is unclear), and ends with him putting a career-ending hit on your team's stud rookie. Sands was as fast, fierce, and unstoppable as Taylor himself, and portrayed with more bravado than even Drew Rosenhaus could spin. Sands was constantly mixed up with steroids, gambling, partying, and drugs, but he was every offensive lineman's worst nightmare. Editor's Note: This clip contains language that some users might find objectionable.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Cwgxg1h4II[/youtube]
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9. Ben Coates, Madden 98

Coates is fourth all-time in receiving yardage for NFL tight ends, but it is unlikely that he will be remembered among the likes of Ozzie Newsome, Kellen Winslow, Shannon Sharpe, and Tony Gonzalez. However, Coates was the favorite target of former New England Patriots quarterback Drew Bledsoe, and that that was enough to make him a Madden superstar. He caught 499 passes in his ten-year career, but it was not uncommon for him to make half that many catches in a single Madden season.

Like Jerry Rice, Coates is enjoying a second chance at digital glory in All-Pro Football 2K8. Unlike virtual Rice, Coates was unquestionably the best receiver in the game when he was on the field. Coates never dropped a pass, and his ability to distance himself from defenders was second to none.

8. Randy Moss

Randy Moss was the first cover athlete for the NFL 2K series, and online gamers flocked to the Minnesota Vikings to dominate their opponents over SegaNet. He was the fastest player in the 2K series and made one-handed, sideline-toeing catches look routine. Now a member of the New England Patriots, Moss' status among the elite video game receivers is sure to improve. Moss was a constant Madden threat even while enduring down years in Oakland, but with Tom Brady in his future, his best years are ahead of him.

7. Mike Singletary, Tecmo Bowl

The best player on the best defense, the combination of Singletary on defense and Walter Payton on offense made the Bears an almost unbeatable team. Unlike Payton, however, there was no one better than Singletary at his position.

6. Thomas Johansson, Virtua Tennis

He was so fast that online matches were reduced to nothing but Thomas Johansson vs. Thomas Johansson in a suped-up version of 3D Pong. Not even the game's boss characters could score a point against him.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3RtUtyQyzA[/youtube]

5. Mario

Mario will be best-remembered for beating Bowser saving the Mushroom Kingdom, but it's hard to overlook the athletic career of history's most adventurous plumber. Mario has starred in a series of video games covering all major sports for three generations of gaming, and he's qualified for the 2008 Olympic Games. And unlike some of the athletes on this list, Mario has always been a fair player. Why, he started his athletic career refereeing matches for the number four entry...

4. Mike Tyson, Mike Tyson's Punch Out!!

Mike Tyson (called "Mr. Dream" in the version released for Wii's Virtual Console) is the last boss of one of the hardest, most addictive games in history. His punches were thunderous and his speed unmatched. Long before Buster Douglas, Danny Williams, or Evander Holyfield, the only boxer in the world with a shot at beating "the baddest man on the planet" was Little Mac.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZChSzoYy8D8[/youtube]

3. Larry Bird, NBA 2K3

What Charles Barkley was to NBA Jam, Larry Bird was to this NBA simulation. He was a flawless three-point shooter and a powerful inside scorer. Bird would effortlessly dunk over Garnett, Duncan, and Shaq, with his only regret being that dunks didn't count for three points, too. Larry Legend was such a feared opponent that players over Xbox Live didn't exchange greetings, they started their conversations with "No Bird."

Bird vs. Jordan, 1988

2. Deion Sanders

The first athlete to play in a World Series and a Super Bowl, Sanders is in the only one on the list to match Mario's versatility. "Prime Time" passes the erstwhile plumber in excellence. With the Atlanta Falcons, he was Tecmo Super Bowl's best special teams player and cornerback - Sanders was able to cover two receivers at once. With the San Francisco 49ers, Sanders was Madden's ultimate shutdown corner. With the Dallas Cowboys, he starred in his own football game as a corner, kick returner, and wide receiver. He was one of the greatest football players in history, and while that was reflected for generations of virtual football gaming, his best performance came on the baseball diamond Triple Play '96. Deion was so fast that he was guaranteed a steal every time he left the bag - any base, any time.

Prime Time NFL Starring Deion Sanders, 1995

1. Bo Jackson, Tecmo Super Bowl

Jackson was the first real-life athlete to be an All Star in two sports, but he made a bigger impact on pop culture than he did on the Raiders or the Royals. "I can't go a week without someone mentioning something about Tecmo Bowl," Jackson said in 2004. He could rack up 400 yards in a single game, even while running backwards for fifty. Forget Lawrence Taylor, forget Mike Singletary - an entire defense couldn't stop Tecmo Bo.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8PBvOxicz-0[/youtube]

Where's Jeremy Roenick? No one from Winning Eleven? How does Deion Sanders rank higher than Jerry Rice!? Discuss this list on The Wiire Boards

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